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Slings and arrows: co-parenting with a narcissist

On Behalf of | Aug 2, 2022 | Child Custody

Narcissism is a complex disorder with which to contend, and being locked in a Pennsylvania child custody battle with someone on the extreme end of the spectrum is the opposite of easy. Since people with high narcissistic tendencies tend to be self-absorbed and reckless, co-parenting can become a nightmare.

So let’s explore a few child custody tips for sharing custody with a narcissist.

Secure a rock solid parenting plan from the court

Judges are the ultimate arbiters of child custody cases, and securing an ultra-detailed settlement should be the goal for anyone dealing with a narcissistic, estranged partner.

Include things like how many times they can call, email or text message per week. Make sure every minor thing is outlined in the child custody agreement.

Use an app

There’s an app for everything these days — including co-parenting ones. Using an app to set up and manage your child custody routine can be a huge help.

Generally speaking, try to keep all communications to the written word, whether that’s by email or text.

Document everything

Child custody is a legal matter — so save everything. If you find yourself back in court, you’ll need to provide evidence for your argument.

Find a therapist

Divorce is hard; divorce involving kids is even more challenging, but divorce featuring both kids and a narcissistic spouse can be a full-scale nightmare. Try not to let it take over every aspect of your life, and find a therapist you like and trust. Venting to a professional several times a month can be a tremendous help.

Try parallel parenting

Parallel parenting is a bit different than co-parenting. The former requires less contact between the former partners. For example, parallel parents usually don’t attend the same events to avoid contact, whereas co-parents spend more time together and may even go on vacation as a family.

Sharing kids with a narcissist is hard, but it’s not impossible. Do your best to keep your cool and approach things practically.